Lately, I’ve found myself reflecting on a loss from my past. I talk about it in the video below.
Twenty-one years ago, I lost my mom. She was just 58 at the time, and this September 4th would have been her 80th birthday. She’s been on my mind a lot — not just because I miss her, but because I keep thinking about the lessons she taught me through how she lived.
When someone we love has shaped us deeply, it’s worth pausing to look back and ask:
What was it about them that stood out?
What did they do so naturally, so beautifully, that we want to live out in our own lives?
For me, one of my mom’s greatest gifts was her ability to see potential in others — and refuse to let it go unnoticed or unspoken.
The Idea That Almost Died
In high school, I had a wild idea: I wanted to play the Star-Spangled Banner on guitar at our basketball games.
After the first time I did it, I had an even crazier thought — what if I could play it in a way that captured the energy and innovation of both Eddie Van Halen and Jimi Hendrix?
When my mom caught wind of that idea, she noticed I wasn’t talking about it much anymore. She asked, “Why aren’t you excited about this?”
I brushed it off. “Well… I don’t have the right equipment. Some people might not like it. And honestly, I don’t know exactly how to do it.”
That’s when she did what great leaders do. She refused to let me bury my idea in fear and resistance.
She said, “Okay, let’s explore that.”
And every time I came up with another reason not to try, she calmly brought me back:
“It’s just us, sitting on the couch. Let’s talk it through. What would it look like?”
That moment taught me one of the most valuable leadership lessons of my life.
Little Ideas Die Quietly
So many little improvements — so many sparks of innovation — die in our heads long before they ever see the light of day.
We think:
“Well, that’s not how we’ve always done it.”
“What if they don’t like it?”
“What if people think it’s stupid?”
Sometimes, after raising our hand a few times and not being heard, we stop raising it altogether.
My mom wouldn’t let me do that. She helped me protect that tiny seed of an idea until I had enough courage to plant it. I borrowed her belief until I had my own.
And that’s exactly what leaders do — they create safe spaces where ideas can grow.
Be the Person Who Notices
If you want to lead like my mom did, here’s where to start:
Drive awareness. Look around you — in your meetings, your family, your friendships. Someone near you might have an idea they’re afraid to say out loud. Pay attention to the little signs: a hesitation, a look, a deep breath.
Invite curiosity. Ask, “Hey, I saw that look on your face — what were you thinking?” Sometimes people just need permission to explore an idea safely.
Create a safe space. That could be a quiet conversation after the meeting, or just you saying, “Let’s talk it through — no pressure.”
You don’t have to be a manager, a CEO, or even an “official” leader.
Leadership starts the moment you encourage someone to explore an idea instead of burying it.
Your Turn
Think about someone who’s influenced your life — someone who showed up in a way that still inspires you.
What was their gift?
How can you live that gift out today?
And the next time you see someone hesitate before speaking up, remember this:
Their idea might be the next great improvement — if only someone notices and says, “Let’s explore it.”
Be that person. Be the one who helps ideas come to life.
